Live, Love and Lead

     How many times have we all started a new year with a New Year's Resolution, such as, maybe,  to lose some extra weight, or give up a bad habit, pay off our credit cards, just to slowly return to the old ways, and calling them a sense of normalcy? It does not have to be like that, though.
     I remember when, years ago, I decided that I would give up smoking, starting on January 1st. Some of my friends, and even some of my relatives, were so used to seeing how I started a new year with a big promise to only then stop from being consistent a few months later, that, when I mentioned that I was going to quit smoking once and for all, they nodded, politely, but incredulously, to my dismay. I knew I had worked hard to achieve that level of support or lack thereof, but even then I somehow expected to be given a new opportunity, a new chance to show the world that I could do it.
      It was not until I stopped from worrying about what the others thought about me and started to focus on my own opinion of myself that I began to be successful in my quest for my own voice. I did not tell anyone else about my resolution, and, alas, started to divide my day into smaller sections, in order to fight in my personal war against tobacco. Yes!  A piece of paper had such control over my life that it was almost embarrassing. I had always felt proud of my self-control and perseverance, and there I was, supposedly unable to control my urge to smoke a cigarette whenever I saw someone smoking.
     The first few days were very familiar: The uneasiness, the lack of control over my temper when someone asked me if I had a cigarette or a lighter, and that urge to walk, run, ride my bike, jog, climb walls, go to the Kilimanjaro, fly to the moon, or whatever you wanna call it. I knew I was in trouble if I continued to follow the same routines: Hanging out with my friends and sitting at a restaurant patio after dinner, going to the movies and walking slowly while talking about the movie, having a coffee together or sitting in a park to plan a new road trip together ... I had to avoid those situations at all cost if I wanted to be successful in my new mission: To live a cigarette-free life.
     During the six months that followed I lost some friends who did not support my journey, walked away from others who did not respect my decision, and -surprisingly- gained some new friends who, out of nowhere, embraced the new me as if we had known each other forever.
      I have been cigarette-free for twenty-one years. At some point in my life, though, I thought I would not be able to achieve this goal. I had tried a total of twelve times, one of them for one year and a half. What happened in 1999 that made me quit for good? I saw a television commercial which made me open my eyes and showed me the real ugliness of smoking: Lung cancer and respiratory infections. I got scared. I wanted to live, love and laugh. Tobacco was not my friend, but my enemy.
     Whoever has said that changes are easy does not know what they are talking about. Change is cruel, painful and very difficult. Nonetheless, change is also necessary and beneficial, once we have conquered it, and we are able to see all our roadblocks as what they really are: stepping stones and connecting bridges.
      Now that I am living a tobacco-free life, I have the moral authority to tell my own teenagers that smoking is prejudicial to their health, and, guess what? They listen to me. They trust me. If only for this, giving up smoking is, by far, one of the best decisions I have made in my whole life. 
       Now that we are entering the last month of the year, I want to proclaim this to be the only December 1st, 2020. This year has not been easy at all. All the contrary, it has been very challenging. However,  I did not use it as an excuse to not grow, or not to do my best. I chose to become the healthiest I have ever been. Instead of quitting smoking, I decided to quit complaining. The same as smoking, it was not easy, and -every single time, I choose to say the same as one of my idols, Rosa Parks: "Not now." I want to invite you to do the same: Become your best. Be brave and show your kindness to the world.  Live your healthiest life. It is not an easy choice, but it is one that you will never regret.